la segunda parte...a sequel!

dear sass.

you know what today is. and you know that i'm thinking of you!

yesterday, this happened:

   

and i loved it. 

(dear everyone besides staisha, 

one time, while staish and i were in hike school, there was a freakin downpour in orem. i unfortunately had ballet class when class got out, so there wasn't much i could do to really soak in the whole experience--pun intended. ha ha. but as i drove home, i knew i just had to aprovechar--enjoy, take advantage of the opportunity. so i called dance people and told them i'd be late... and headed to staisha's. 
she was thrilled by the surprise. we went puddle jumping around her house like no one has ever been puddle jumping before. at one point, her dad passed us in his huge diesel truck, splashed us hardcore, and turned around to do it again. :) at one point, we even found ourselves laying in the gutter as passerbys (julia mcdougal) drove by looking sooooooooooooooo confused about what the freak we were doing. 

we were then freezing, so we warmed up by sitting in her bathtub discussing everything from rain to death. 

it was an epic experience. 

every time it rains i want to repeat the experience. in fact, there's even a part in the above video where i pause, look at the water, and legitimately consider laying myself down right there in the gutter to show ivan what hardcore puddle jumping is. ha. but i was tame.

this video was reminiscent of that day...minus the fact by how calm i am in it.)

____________________

and, while i have you here, remember this? 

well, here goes part two:
...

we reunited after croatia and san diego at the friendship tree only to be quite dismayed.

we were different.

the tree was different.

our names aren't there anymore.

that branch is up there WAY higher than we remembered it being. 

and...we have lost some serious agility and gained some serious weight or something because....

...it was a struggle getting up there!

after several attempts, staisha rendered herself useless, and gave up...

...injured.

but we smiled for the camera because the world saw my garments as i struggled to climb the tree, and that was funny! and your ankle bled, and that was funny! 

and also because, yeah, we're different--life is so different--but the important things, the things that reeeeeally matter... are still the same. and we're happy. it's a different, deeper, unspoken, fought-for kind of happiness. 

but we have it. especially when life permits us to do dumb stuff together. 

and that's well worth smiling about.

I repeat:

"can someone ever go back to being 100%? no. i don't think so. first of all, i don't think there's such a thing as 100%. second, i think that people go through crap so they can make up what they lack by learning new things...and come back as a new, different, person, with an even greater capacity to live and do. you've been through a lot. and it's really shaken your world, rocked your boat. it's changed your perspective and altered your life and identity. and that's good. it's right. it's meant to be that way. absolutely. so no, you'll never go back to who or how you were before. ever. she's gone and dead. get over it. but your'e YOU. you're staisha, NOW. older, wiser, more calloused, with more feeling, more depth, more intelligence, more empathy, more faith, more to offer. you're you. you're new. you're closer to 100%. and you're GREAT."

I still love you a whole lot. and i'm still so grateful for your timeless friendship. years later.

 see you at the friendship tree, beauty. and this time...we'll burn our names into the bark.