Monday, April 27, 2009

There I Was

Vacuuming my ceiling wondering ... “what is going on?” (Brian Regan) ... “how do people live like this?” (Mallory), seeing the hairs, sand, spiders and cockroaches zoom up my vacuum like I was the queen of their galaxy; I never thought I’d see the day when I would so purposefully smash a cockroach with my bare palm. There I was on my naked knees kneeling on that sticky tile and itchy carpet, mixing various mostly-empty bottles of cleaners and tilting the vacuum in new ways to avoid deepened blisters as I attempted to achieve even a sub-fraction of the word “clean;” there I was, knowing what Will would say, humming sporadic “Dusty Road” lines and hearing the waves hit that volcanic ashen wall outside my apartment-home in between her breaths. There I was walking through those outdoor hallways, or finding myself in unbelievably, wonderfully ridiculous tropical storms, breathless for one reason or another. There I was standing near the milk debating debating debating about the nine dollar price tag; love you, Ma, thanks for the sound advice. There I was hiking through mud and brush up an eight mile-long trail, waiting for Jack and Hurley and Kate to burst through the foliage and surprise me on my way to carry out Number Eight on My Bucket List. There I was in that freshwater pool, after hitting my legs on those rocks, feeling grateful and happy and cold as the sun hid, because it didn’t matter—I finally crossed my dream of swimming in a waterfall pool off The List. There I was photo machen-ing that sunset, eating a Mahi Mahi sandwich and choco manula pie or something as I FROZE [I have been colder here in Hawaii than I have in all my days in Utah. What a joke.]. There I was sitting beneath those stars, watching the clouds travel across at light-speed [what is it? I should know this, bad Physical Science Student, Tawny: 3 x 10?], night-day-dreaming of my remarkable friend in Brasil, again, hearing the ocean in my backyard.  There I was.

Here I am.

I keep reminding myself: You are in Hawaii.

It hasn’t sunk in. I don’t think it will. But I am loving living and breathing in such a stunning place. Blessed.

Here are a bunch of wildly overdue photos.



Laie temple! 
are you seeing that spider? dkjafs






truly. the vista from my deck.



clean clean apartment.

third time cleaning the kitchen floor.




i do love large foliage

daytrip to honolulu


love ya, kels

happy birthday johnny

7 comments:

Aimee said...

tawny. you're in hawaii. living. how fake does that seem? how ideal. i'm jealous, but hopefully i'll have a fabulous summer here in provo too. i love you and i love the pictures you took. gorgeous. miss ya.

Anonymous said...

I love it!!! That is so great that you're in Hawaii. Are you going to school? Doing a visiting sememster? I thought they didn't do that anymore. I wanted to do it. I hope you're having so much fun! Love ya!

Claire said...

Whoa. Whoaaaaa.
Tawny. I get this feeling when I read what you write. It makes me start giggling without control. That doesn't happen to me often.
My eyes were jumping back and forth between your pictures on the side and your pictures in your post. And then I hit your word collage. WHOA!
I want to hug you.
I hope you're having a swell time...like I need to tell you to.
Love.

Kelsea said...

kachow. stop this. stop being awesome. no that was a joke. continue. please. share? maybe. laugh. how many times did we take those blasted pictures by the o rock? haha. many times. gross. i cant imagine what will would say in that disaster. gross spiders. beauty. lucky. enjoy yourself darling. happy. birthday.

Word verification (these always amuse me): ationt

Ali said...

WHAT ARE THOSE SPIDERS?! get out of town. i bet you are hating that, but DUDE! It looks like youre loving life. i loved those photos-i love you. i hope youre having soo soo much fun. each a pineapple for me yeaha? love.

Becca Gilbert said...

Tawny! You are in Hawaii? I am ridiculously jealous! Look at you going on all your fun adventures!

Scott & Ali said...

TAWNY! I cannot believe your pictures are real. Those are from your camera lens and not from a travel magazine. WOWOWOWOW! I am jealous although I am perfectly content being in happy little Provo with my sweetie. I am married! It's great. We have been married for 8 days now and it just feels right. I feel whole.

ps, do you like how i comment on your pics and then just talk about myself? typical.